After the end...(the final way of saying "I love you",,,)

...can be nothing. Or can be the last struggle to start it all over again. I chose the second method. The nothingness seems a little bit too limited and in consequence, too boring for me. This, besides the fact that I consider that all the states of the mind and the soul should be felt at least once in a life time. Including the extremes. The extreme happiness and the extreme sorrow. And to survive all of them...Than, you become complete....and than there can be...nothing.

The 2 pictures with you are still in the electronic frame's memory..I see them sometimes, when I shuffle through it. It seems like ages since you took your decisions, though there are only some days...Everything changed...Including me. All that is left from us, is a pale shadow of pain which is pushing me from time to time, when I loose myself in memories. It's far too late to know if your decision was good or bad...I've never hidden from you my strong side. That part of me that can turn off feelings and can just go with the flow. There were times when I wished you will never get to see it, feel it, stand it...I know, it's hard. And yes, I know you are hurt...and if there was any reason why I never wanted to let it go, this was the first one. I guess you feel it every time I am not...alone...because those are the only times when you are letting me know you still exist.  But it was you who made the choice for both of us...

The child opened his fist and the butterfly flew ... he followed it with his eyes and turned to his mother. "It is gone...But it was so beautiful, mum!" and a tear rolls on his red chick...."My child, but you don't have to cry....that's how it has to be...this is how butterflies are. They are meant to fly as much as they can, to make the Sun smile and the sky blue..."...

There is only one way to see what is after the end. By living it. Now, after all this disaster, after all the breaking and emptiness, I am recovering...in a way or another. Patiently, taking every piece of my soul and trying to put it back together. There are a lot of pieces missing...But I am strong enough to make it, even without a center. So just...forget everything, but this "One day, we will lay back on the sand and I will teach you the constellations...."

The pieces of glass entered so deep that nothing can remove them anymore...because one is enough to be taken away to start the uncontrolled bleeding...